Happy Birthday To ME!!!!! And Gift For Someone.

Happy Birthday to Mel....Happy Birthday to Mel...LMAO! Okay I'll stop. Yes, it's my birthday and Peter Jackson and Wing Nut Studios have thoughtfully released The Hobbit for me. Aren't they sweet? I'm going to be celebrating in Middle Earth with hobbits and dwarves, yeah, baby!

While I am off, venturing through the Shire, sipping tea (well more like margaritas, hey tea don't cut it) at Bag End, I thought I would leave you with a giveaway. Yes, that's right, it's my B-Day, but you could win a prize,  a free download of one of my stories. The winner gets to pick from among those on my side bar. As they are downloads, they're convenient and make excellent Christmas gifts, if I do say so, myself. I mean, who doesn't want to spice up their holiday season. ;)

The rules are simple:

Leave a comment and riddle me this: How do you think I should rock out on my B-Day? Give me your most outrageous, over-the-top answer. I have bail money so sky's the limit. I'll announce the winner on Monday, December 17th.

Also, leave your email in the comments, along with your story choice, so I can notify the winner. My gay steampunk tale, The Physician's Lieutenant is also on the table if you'd care to wait a bit for the release.

To give you an idea, one of my most outrageous birthday celebrations involved a pub crawl, strippers,  falling in a duck pond, table dancing and a trip to White Castle ala Harold and Kumar so while I may be old, I do have a wild side. And yes, there is photographic evidence, but this was right before digital cameras so they shall remain buried until all participants have been relocated or have expired. If I remember right, the table dance was me shaking my caboose to...Party Train by that quintessential soul group The Gap Band. Dig that 80's look in this vid. Choo... Choo.. Get on board...




So, what are you all up to this weekend? Going to Middle Earth? Here's hoping you have lots of fun whatever you are doing.

Greetings From No-Man's Land

Hi there my Imaginarians! I have missed you all so very much, you don't even know. I have been stuck in No-Man's Land for what seems like forever. I am still there, in the midst of a huge grind, but for the time being I am posting again and will be trying to get around to visit all of you. I've been hard at work on a steampunk tale that's due December 1 as well as several other writing pieces all while trying to find a full time job and keep ahead of my bills. At last have my head a bit above this drowning tide. Yay!!

It hasn't been all bad. I found out that my wonderful friend Dez over at The Hollywood Spy has given me his Heart Award. He is celebrating 2 million visitors!! How awesome and incredible is that? Read this amazing post here. Thank you so much, my dear. It made my month. Check out this beautiful award...

My oldest nephew treated his aunt to Resident Evil: Retribution and I took him to dinner. We had a blast. We also went shopping for Halloween costumes. He's going to be a zombie and I am putting together a Rocky Horror Magenta outfit. I think I could rock that wild hair. I've also been doing my touchdown dance quite frequently thanks to my Bears and my fave college team, Notre Dame. And can I say that for once, my Fantasy Football team, the Army of Darkness, has been killing it, too. Usually I am sucking at this point in the season. Whoo Hoo!

So what have you all been up to? Tell me, tell me!! I'm dying to hear all of your news. I HAVE MISSED YOU!!!

Bad News

I have some bad news. I have to take a forced hiatus for about a month or so. I don't want to, but deadlines and some personal issues are pressing at me right now and I have to take a break. I hope to be around the blogosphere visiting, but I don't know if I'll be able to do even that right now. I will miss you all terribly, especially the lively conversations and interactions. I hadn't planned on this, but stuff happens. Thank you all for the awesome comments on the Guilty Pleasures Blogfest post. If I did not get a chance to return the comment, I'm really sorry, I will try at the earliest opportunity to respond in kind. Take care of yourselves, be well, happy and safe until I get back into the game.

Until soon...Peace, my Imaginarians, my friends!

Attack of the Neat Freaks

Today is a rant, so if you're looking for something positive or beautiful, the Imaginarium is fresh out today.

Neat Freaks, you know, those persnickety Felix Unger types. God help me, whenever I encounter one of these people. I feel a twitch starts in my right eye and I hear this C-3PO-esque voice say, "Melissa, a place for every thing and every thing in its place." And blah, blah, blah... I have a friend, whom I privately refer to as Nora Neatnik, who constantly tries to clean my house. Just like my grandma. "Nora" is always poking around offering organization and cleaning tips, suggestions for vacuum attachments she's found and other tidy up things she likes. I want to scream! She was here the other day and well...It was another episode of Attack of the Neatfreaks. I swear I should write a horror film about this.

Yes, maybe my closet doubles as a last minute storage bin when company comes over. And perhaps my desk is full of notebooks, post-its, and the bracelets I wore yesterday. So maybe I have a few foil-wrapped science experiments at the back of my refrigerator. And every now and again you could ride the dust bunnies under my bed and dresser.

I don't care! That's the way this bitch rolls.

I've got things to do, a life to live. Just because my housekeeping leaves a bit to be desired, doesn't mean I am a hapless slob. There are not roaches crawling over my house. There is no stench wafting across the neighborhood (That's the refinery across the border in Hammond) I don't have to clear a path in case of a fire. So, I don't make my bed other than to pull the blanket over it. I'm going right back there in a few hours. Yes, my book shelves are crammed with paperbacks that have dog-eared pages and assorted rocks and crystals. I don't have enough room for everything and I want it all out where I can see them, touch them. They are my things.

So to all the neatfreaks out there haranguing their not-so-neat-friends, let me give you some South Side Chitown advice "Suck it up buttercup. Ain't your crib."

Mmmm...What's Your Chocolate?

It's a delicious start to the week as the awesome MPax, Laura Eno, Brinda Berry and Ciara Knight are bringing us the What's Your Chocolate Blogfest. Journey 'round the blogosphere and find out all the tasty treats my fellow participants have in store for you. You can uncover the goodness by clicking here.

Also, I unleashed my werewolf, Maxie Briscoe over at my friend Sloane Taylor's blog today, so head on over and see what she's up to. 

Chocolate makes the world, heck the universe, spin as far as I am concerned. I love it in just about everything. Chocolate milk, chocolate martinis, chocolate cake, chocolate chips, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate...You get the idea. I think my favorite chocolate, though is dark chocolate. Plain, bittersweet, melts- in- my- mouth dark chocolate. I love to eat it in whole bars, chocolate chips, drizzled over fruit and you know, it makes great body paint. Close your mouth, you knew I would put something naughty in here, I am an erotica writer after all. LOL

Dark chocolate is also incredibly good in brownies, ice cream and almond bark. So very many ways to enjoy this gift from the gods. Plus, unlike it's milk cousin, dark chocolate is good for you. It's an antioxidant machine, it prevents arteries from clogging and can reduce blood pressure. Plus, for a diabetic like me, it has a low glycemic index which means it keeps my blood sugar from spiking. How's that for awesome?

So, I wanna know, how do you take your chocolate?

IWSG: Branding

I can't believe it's the first week of September already. That means it's time for another installment of the stupendous Insecure Writers Support Group. Started by the amazing Alex J. Cavanaugh, this is the time when we writers can get our insecurities and fears off our chests, where we can share our troubles, frustrations and yes, send out some positive energy to each other. Click above to visit the other participants today. They really are  the most awesome people.

Today I am talking about the B word, Branding. This is a HUGE insecurity to me as a published author. I don't really know how to do this, yet, the pressure keeps mounting for me to brand myself. My crit partners, some of my other fellow writers, they're all after me to have a tag, an image. I know that it is good for marketing purposes, but what does it even mean? Do I have to stick to one genre?  And what about my non-fiction? As it stands I write everything under my own name. Just how do I incorporate all my different types of writing?  And if I don't do this, how am I supposed to market my stories and myself?

Was I wrong to write everything under my own name?  I mean all the advice I've seen talks about authors being genre specific. You see how confused I am? This post has been nothing but questions.  Man, I feel like banging my head on my desk til it bleeds...Anybody got any good advice to share? I appreciate anything you might offer up. I am completely clueless.
 

Spotlight At The Writing Nut

Today is the BIG DAY...I'm featured over at The Writing Nut for Wednesday Writer's Workspace. Whoo Hoo!! Come and check it out. See what my work space looks like (you were dying to know, weren't you?) and if I have a hidden talent. Nutschell has me revealing all. And here's a look at two companions who share my writing space at times. Look at those lazy girls. Precious is the black one and Cookie is the tiger. They're my roommates cats, but they tolerate me, too.

Liebster Redux: 11 Badass Questions From M

My badass home girl M Hufstader of the killer blogs The Smoking Pen and Feed Me A Stray Cat, has tapped yours truly to receive her Liebster Award. Hell Yeah! And while I've tapped people already for this award, I'm still going to share 11 more things about me because well, you all want to know more don't you? I knew you did. LOL

But first let's get to M's Q's shall we?

3-D Yes or No?

I'm going to have to go with no as the tech leaves me with a headache so why pay more to be in pain.

Lord of the Rings or Star Wars?

I'm a total wimp. I can't choose as I love them both equally, but for very different reasons.

What movie would you like to see in theaters that you never got to?

Gone With The Wind. I have never ever seen this on a big screen and would relish the experience.

What's your major draw for a movie: actors, director or script?

Script. I have to have a great story in order to shell out for tix. I can honestly say that I have never chosen a film because of a director or actor.

Who is your favorite person to watch movies with?

My nephew. He sits there, shuts the hell up and let's it ride. And he likes all the movies I pay to see in the theater.

Who are your top three action heroes?

Indiana Jones, Bruce Lee and Mallory Kane. For those not familiar with Mallory, she's from Soderbergh's epic film Haywire.

The zombie apocalypse is upon us-what movie characters do you want in your camp to keep you alive?

Hmm...Machete, Alice from Resident Evil,  Ripley and Vasquez from Aliens and The Terminator. I think they could work well together. I would also include any Shia LeBeouf character because we need zombie snack cakes in case things get tight.

Who is the one actor you love to hate?

That's easy, Keira Knightly. Completely over-rated and over-used. Need an English girl? Give it to Keira. I wish she would quit acting and go work at McDonald's. Eat some fries so she might put on a milligram or two. I don't know why I loathe her, but I swear I want to put out my eyes with knitting needles and pour bleach in my ears every time I'm forced to watch her on screen.

And the actor I hate myself for loving?

Channing Tatum He is so hot and he's not all that talented, I used to not like him, but then I saw an interview and well, he had me at fake mountain lion and hiding in an outhouse.

If they made a movie about your life, who would play you?

Janeane Garafalo. She's short, has my twisted, cynical sense of humor and sarcasm to spare. Like moi.

If you could change one movie ending, what would it be and why?

I'd change Twilight. Bella discovers she's into girls, stakes Edward, then runs off with Buffy the Vampire Slayer thus saving us all the misery of the subsequent films.

11 More things about me you probably don't care to know, but I'll share anyway. :)

I love the color blue, any and all shades of blue.

Pink makes me look like a ham. 

My fave Japanese monster is Rodan

I can fill your power steering fluid should you need it.

I love toast with peanut butter and banana slices

The first time I cut my hair was 8th grade. I went pixie short the day before graduation unbeknownst to my mother. Her restraint is why I survived to adulthood.

I like to blow bubbles in the house. I taught my nephews to do that and can you tell I don't have kids? LOL

My first pet was a dog named Bandit and the first street I lived on was Avenue G. They say strippers name themselves after their first pets and their home streets. I would be the G Bandit. Perfect or what?

I eat Reese's peanut butter cups by eating the outer rim first, then peeling off the top chocolate.

The only wine I like is Moscato. Can't stand anything else, but I haven't had much in the way of wine, either.

I have a scar over my right brow where my brother hit me with a piece of firewood while we were playing The Incredible Hulk.

Like what you've read? Had enough about me? I hope you all have a terrific Monday. :)

Exciting News

Just a quick post to share some exciting news here. Next week, on Wednesday, August 22, I'm going to be spotlighted at The Writing Nut. Yay! I can't wait. Come on over and find out all about my writing life, my non-writing life and what my hidden talent is. Bet you can't guess.

Tomorrow, August 17th, author Angela Renee will be here. I will have a short interview with her as well as an excerpt from her new book, the hot sci fi romance,You Are Mine.

Next week I will also have a couple of book reviews. I'm finally, FINALLY starting to catch up on my reading.

I will leave you with another picture from my hike at Porcupine Mountain State Park. This is Lake of the Clouds where Brenda and I started our hike. I scooted out onto an overhang to take this. For those who asked, here is the link for the bear story.  It was part of my very first A to Z Challenge. Enjoy, it is pretty funny. Now that I am years removed from it. ;)

My Unforgettable Place

My incredible friend, Siv over at Been There, Done That is celebrating the release of  her short story, Secrets of the Ash Tree with the Unforgettable Blogfest. Secrets will be released September 4 in the fantasy anthology Open Doors. Yay Siv!

Now, what makes this blogfest so brilliant, aside from celebrating Siv's story, is that we each get to share the person or place that is absolutely unforgettable to us. How awesome is that? To check the other incredible participants, click here

I'm going to share with you a place that I hiked to with my best friend in the entire world, Brenda. It was 1995 and I had just gotten vacation time from my first job after college. Brenda had invited me to go camping with her and I was nervous as heck. Hell, I watch horror films. Give me a hood rat with a gun or blade any day rather than some backwoods scary redneck with plans to skin me and eat me. Then there was always the distinct possibility that a Jason Voorhees type would likely come at me with an axe or machete.

I digress.

She took me to Porcupine Mountain State Park in Michigan. I had never gone hiking in my life. I'm South Side Steel Town girl and to me hiking was what one did when having to walk about 10 blocks to catch the bus.  The last time I had actually been in woods that weren't a city forest preserve was age 10 in Scouts. My troop and I had gone to Butternut Springs, a huge Girl Scout camp in Indiana. Cabin, bus, indoor plumbing... not exactly roughing it.

So Brenda and I set out on this immense trail with backpacks and tent. Now, I am voluptuous chica to say the least, even more so back then. But I had been slowly starting to lose weight, so I was eager to push myself. We started off high above the park at Lake of the Clouds, then we hiked down through some rough trails. I was a sweaty, rotten mess, but I was still feeling all right. Then fatigue started to hit and just when I was hitting pain, we came upon this scene on the trail. This is the Presque Isle River, which runs through Michigan's Upper Peninsula and empties out into Lake Superior.

Beautiful, isn't it? I couldn't believe that I, Melissa Bradley, had hiked miles into a forest and was able to see this amazing scene. It was like being in my own nature film. Scary bear encounter aside, this is one memory that will stay with me always. I was so happy to be able to share it with Brenda.This woman has always been my rock and my instigator. If I'm going to get into trouble not of my own making, she's behind it. No wonder she's on my team when the zombie horde comes.

What Was Your Childhood Monster...A Blogfest

In honor of the release of author Christine Rains' story Fearless, which releases today, I am talking about what my childhood monsters were. Congratulations, Christine!

And since this is a blogfest, please click here for the other amazing participants.

I know you all who know me are thinking werewolf. And while I admit to thinking my great-grandma's neighbor was a werewolf one summer, no. The Big Bad Monster from my childhood were creatures I believe my Grandpa Bradley made up or maybe it was his grandpa, it's family legend so we can't be sure, really. Anyway, these creatures were called the Hobiats (pronounced HO-BEE-OTS. They were hairy, lumpy creatures with beady red eyes that came at night to steal your toys and bite your toes. Usually it happened if you didn't clean your room, but sometimes they just wanted toys. Not to mention a good snack of little piggy toes. LOL. There was no escape, either. They could get into your room through the closet, under the bed and even scarier, through the vents. Picture this, I grew up in an old Chicago style bungalow with very big, scary vents.

 One birthday night, I think I was eight, I had gotten Malibu Barbie (I know, me with Barbie) and my father said those horrifying words, "Watch out for the Hobiats." When my parents went to bed, I got up, grabbed the big flashlight from the kitchen and my little red toy dog Iff-Iff. My canine companion and I went and sat right in front of the big vent in my room. We were positioned just right so between the two of us, we could keep an eye on the closet and my bed, too. Those Hobiats were so not going to get Barbie. After all, Santa was bringing my Barbie Pent House in just ten more days for Christmas. Barbie was staying right here. I also remembered to put on my winter boots so the Hobiats could not bite my toes. I was keeping all of my little piggies. I stayed awake as long as I could staring at that dark vent, waiting for those horrid creatures. My dad found me the next morning curled up on the floor with a dead flashlight and my toy dog. He, of course told my Uncles Dennis and Moose, who proceeded to tease me mercilessly the entire next summer.

What were your childhood monsters? Did you have or were you a cool kid who had no fear?

She Said, He Said Our 50 Favorite Movies

Happy weekend and welcome to one-half of the dual post  She Said, He Said: Our 50 Favorite Movies. I, of course am the She Said while my good friend Brent Allard from the wonderfully brilliant site Criminal Movies is my He Said. Today we are spotlighting our 50 favorite films, well 50 of them anyway. :) These are the films we love for various reasons, not necessarily because they changed the landscape of cinema or won  Academy Awards. So here they are in no particular order, just categories for organization. And while I tried to stay at 50,  I kinda sorta went over. By a lot. In my defense there are about 500 more that I left off the list. I can't help it, I love movies. LOL And I was never one for rules anyway, even if they are my own. ;)

Click for Brent's List

Horror

The Howling (1981)
The Exorcist (1973)
John Carpenter's The Thing (1982)
Dawn of the Dead (2004) 
Halloween (1979)
Psycho (1960):
The Evil Dead trilogy (1981)
30 days of Night (2007) 
Frankenstein (1994)
 Dracula (1992)
Silver Bullet (1985)
Dog Soldiers (2002)

Sci Fi

Aliens (1987)
Star Wars trilogy (1977-83) 
E.T. (1982)
Independence Day (1996)
The Day The Earth Stood Still (1951)
Blade Runner (1982)
The Terminator (1984)
Serenity (2005)

Crime

Thunderheart (1992)
The Usual Suspects (1995)
Zodiac (2007)
The Big Easy (1986)
Mississippi Burning (1988)
Thelma & Louise (1991)
The Accused (1988)
Natural Born Killers (1994)
Pulp Fiction (1994)
El Mariachi (1992)
Sin City (2005)
Dog Day Afternoon (1975)



Mob 

Once Upon A Time In America (1984)
 Goodfellas (1990)
The Godfather (1972)
The Untouchables (1987)

Thriller

Jaws (1975):
Cape Fear (1962)
Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Comedy

Stripes (1981)
Princess Bride (1987)
Zombieland (2009)
Arsenic & Old Lace (1944)
The Thin Man (1934)
Topper (1937)
Bad Teacher (2011)

Action

Haywire (2012)
Hanna (2011):
Kill Bill Vol 1 & 2 (2003-4)
Gladiator (2000)
The Hunt for Red October (1990)
Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)
The Long Kiss Goodnight (1996)
Enter the Dragon (1973)

Drama

Mask (1985)
Silkwood (1983)
To Kill A Mockingbird (1962)
Casablanca (1942)
Whale Rider (2002)
Inherit The Wind (1960)
Sophie's Choice (1982)
Brokeback Mountain (2005)
Steel Magnolias (1989)
Hoffa (1992)
How Green Was My Valley (1941)
A League of Their Own (1992)
Joan of Paris (1942)

Romantic

Titanic (1997)
Heaven Knows Mr. Allison (1957)
Romeo and Juliet (1968)
When Harry Met Sally (1989)
Somewhere In Time (1980)
Last of the Mohicans (1992)
High Road To China (1983)

War

Glory (1989)
Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)
All Quiet on the Western Front (1930)
Platoon (1986)
Casualties of War (1989)
The Longest Day (1962)
Run Silent, Run Deep (1958)

Fantasy
 
Lord of the Rings trilogy (2001-3)
The Crow (1994)
300 (2006)
Big Trouble In Little China (1986)

Cargasms

Vanishing Point (1971)
Fast Five (2011)
Bullitt (1968)

Western

Dances With Wolves (1990)
The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance (1962)
3:10 To Yuma (1957)
The Good, The Bad and The Ugly (1966)
El Dorado (1966)
The Searchers (1956)



What a long ass list, huh? I'm glad you stuck it out. What are some of your favorites? And don't forget to check out Brent's list.

Some More Inspiration

I was so fired up by the comments you all left yesterday on my Insecure Writers Support Group post that I wanted to share a song that I have recently begun to listen to as a "Pump Me Up" tune. The song is called "The Fighter" by Gym Class Heroes featuring Ryan Tedder. It's all about digging deep and pressing on against your demons and all other odds.

Here's the video, it features US gymnast John Orozco, who rose to the top of his sport in spite of being a poor kid from the Bronx. Gymnastics is a hell of an expensive sport and to get where he is from where he came from, well that in itself is mighty impressive. He certainly defines fighter.

Thank you,  my friends, my fellow writers. Here's to you and finding that fighting spirit no matter what dream you are pursuing.




Stay tuned as this weekend, Brent from Criminal Movies and I will be posting a She Said He Said: Our 50 Favorite Films of All Time. It's going to be really cool.

My Liebster Award

Happy Tuesday, Imaginarians! Have you all been enjoying the Olympics? I have. Go World! I'm really excited, today, because my good blog buddy, Kaijinu over at the horror film site Sticky Red: A Body Count, has tapped yours truly for the Liebster Award. How cool is that?

Now the acceptance rules are as follows:
1. Each person must 11 things about themselves
2. Answer 11 questions posed to them by the person giving them the Liebster.
3. Create 11 questions for the people I am giving the award to.
4. Choose my 11 suspects and link to them
5. Visit their sites and tell them
6. No tag backs.

So 11 Things about me you don't already know...LOL What haven't I told you? And if I have repeated myself, don't tell me. Just laugh and let it go. I would be most appreciative

1. I love Starbuck's Green Tea Frappuccinos. I think I have a serious addiction.

2. I do not know how to swim.  I do not even know how to float. Which leads me to...

3. I don't like being in water. I don't mind rain, I love to be on water in a boat, I love walking along lakes, beaches, etc., but I will not be in a pool for more than forty minutes or an hour. Same goes for lakes/rivers/oceans. I just don't like it, never have and never will.

4. I love to color. I have boxes of crayons and all of these dollar store cheap coloring books. I love it, there is something about filling in color that relaxes me.

5. I am uncomfortable in crowds. I can handle it for a while, but when I am done, I am DONE. Move out of my way or face my wrath. I once had to sit for an hour and a half in a Six Flags Great America park area I was so bad. I cursed out poor Wile E. Coyote when he dared approached me. I am probably the only person ever called a bitch by a cartoon character.

6. I once owned an Easy Bake Oven and used to put all manner of dough in there to bake. What a great toy that was.

7. I love, love, LOVE tequila. Jose Cuervo is my best friend and my bitch. I once downed 6 shots in about 2 minutes, limes and salt included. I was lit for the night, needless to say. My hangover the next day was cured by aspirin and a can of Coke. And it is the only alcohol that has not made me vilely sick.

8. My first horror film in theater was Friday the 13th the Final Chapter, which is actually Part 4, I think.

9. I took ballet as a kid. There is a picture of me in a bee costume that I will have to post sometime.

10. I make really excellent pasta with homemade sauces. So if you're ever in my hood...come on over.

11. I am a sports junkie and my mouth runs away with me at games.  I am fiercely loyal to my teams. Yes, I am that obnoxious loudmouth behind you at games and I have superstitious routines on game day. Don't mess with them, I'll cut you.

11 questions from Kaijinu

1. Had you ever daydreamed about something and what's the most memorable one you ever had? I day dream all the time, it's part of how I write stories. Of, course I write erotica and write about werewolves.. Those are some pretty wild daydreams. LOL.

2. Who's the one Comic Book hero you NEVER want to see made to a movie out of respect and fear of flopping? Haven't thought about that because every comic book I read has been made into a movie. 

3. Will you try to dance Jamie Lee Curtis' disco scene in Prom Night (1980) with a partner? Heck yeah, I love to shake my booty every now and again.

4. Name one of the least likely movie franchise entry that suddenly became your number one fave? Well,  I love all the big franchises, but probably Friday the 13th. I came in on the middle, was not a horror fan yet, and now it's one of my fave film franchises of all time.

5. What's the weirdest experience you had involving a movie? (theatres, DVD releases, etc.) The first time I went to midnight show of Rocky Horror. I got whacked by bread, squirted with a water gun, then bashed my head. All in 6 in platforms with a purple wig. 

6. Did you ever had a crush on a fantasy character in your teen years? If yes, who? Yes indeed, I did. Indiana Jones. I just started helping out at a local archaeology dig and those movies were hot at the box office. 

7. If a movie character out of your fave flicks suddenly appeared in front of your doorstep, who will it be and what'll you do? Tallahasse from Zombieland and we are so getting Twinkies and going zombie hunting.

8. WATCH OUT! EXTRA TERRESTRIALS! And you have a tool shed behind you! What'll you do? Go in, grab the biggest spade, shears and weed whacker, then start fighting.

9. With all these news on rocket launches, disease outbreaks and people killing each other, how close do you think we are before things go 28 Weeks Later? A few months. I'm practicing my crossbow.

10. If you had the power to change yer appearance, who's face yer gonna try first? Author Stephenie Meyer so I could retract all the Twilight crap and have Edward staked then have Jacob shot with a silver bullet. All by Bella.

11.Worst tasting delicacy you ever encountered? Cavier. Blech!

 My 11 Questions

1. Most over-rated actress/actor?
2. You could travel anywhere in the blink of an eye. Where would you go first?
3. Strangest subject you have ever seen listed in a college course catalog and were tempted to take.
4. You and your friends are fighting off zombies, what is your weapon of choice and why.
5. What superhero would you be if you could?
6. What is the worst movie you have ever seen in the theater?
7. Favorite Monster
8. What reality show would you like to see cancelled?
9. If you could eliminate one global problem, what would it be?
10. Best car you've ever owned.
11. What was the first thing you ever bought with your first paycheck?
My Honorees
I'm going with 11 as 1+1 side by side. I know it's probably cheating, but...These are two blogs I love and need to make more time for. I hope they don't hate me for putting on the pressure here. :)

The Geek Twins Maurice and Nigel have one of the coolest, most geektastic sites on the web
A Piece of My Mind Julia Phillips Smith A writer of fantasy and lover of books and movies.

Friday Fun

First, big congrats to Michelle Pickett, whose debut novel Concilium drops today. yay, Michelle! Please head on over and give her some well wishes.

Today, I am in dire need of a good laugh, so I am posting some of my fave funnies here. The first is "Captain Hareblower" a 1954 cartoon pitting Bugs Bunny against the dread pirate Yosemite Sam. I still get a belly laugh out of these two.



This second little cartoon is Daffy Duck as Robin Hood, a hilarious favorite of mine. Note, when I laugh really hard, I look and sound remarkably like Porky Pig in here, a wheezing, heaving uncontrollable mass.And yes, I do fall out laughing. What can I say, I love to laugh and I throw myself into it.



Happy Friday! I hope you enjoyed these little ditties today. Hope you all have an awesome weekend. I am going to be writing and watching movies. I'm thinking I am in the mood for fantasy and adventure. Or perhaps a good tale of war, preferably WWI. What will you be doing?

The Crow

"People once believed that when someone dies, a crow carries their soul to the land of the dead. But sometimes, something so bad happens that a terrible sadness is carried with it and the soul can't rest. Then sometimes, just sometimes, the crow can bring that soul back to put the wrong things right."

Today I want to share my thoughts on a film that resonates with me on every level.  I fell in love with The Crow from the first moment I saw it. It's a glorious, almost Shakespearean, tale of revenge, lost love and justice that spoke to directly to me. Compound that with the tragedy surrounding the production and source material and well, needless to say it seared itself into my writer's soul. This is sacred cinema to me, an untouchable film whose mark must surely be set in stone.

The Crow defined a cultural tide which birthed grunge rock and gave rise to a disaffected Gen X, who had survived the saccharine sugar coma of the 80's, Reagan Republicanism and hair metal. More over, it is the opus of a young actor whose life was cut tragically short. When I heard that a remake was planned, not sequel, prequel, but an actual remake, I was seized with horror. Yes, I bitched about the Evil Dead reboot and snark blasted the upcoming Dirty Dancing retelling, but none of those left me as disturbed as the remake of The Crow.

It is a project that has been in the making for at least four years. I believe that it has been plagued with problems and constant cast changes because no one wants to really touch this mythic tale. And yet, the studio persists. I have heard the cast choices to portray the titular vengeful rocker and ultimate badass, Eric Draven. Bradley Cooper, Mark Wahlberg and Channing Tatum...No, no and no. I cannot wrap my mind around any of them, let alone picturing a single one donning the iconic black and white makeup. They've had various directors attached to the project as well, who have all left for a multitude of reasons. Juan Carlos Fresnadillo is the latest and  most likely to stay. While I like him and he would surely do a decent job, I'm still violently opposed.

The Crow is a legendary picture in which all the stars aligned  and an epic was born. First, there is the source material. Created from the ashes of James O'Barr's eight year labor of grief to try and overcome the death of his fiancee, The Crow is the ultimate story of the power of love. David Show and John Shirley took this incredible series and turned it into an unforgettable screenplay. Eric Draven, the young rocker murdered along with his fiancee, crosses back to the world of the living on the wings of a crow to take revenge on the thugs who killed them. Brandon Lee, a rising young star was chosen to play Draven and gave the performance of his career. It was sadly to be his last as an on set accident took his life with just eight days left to shoot. Director Alex Proyas, with the blessing of Lee's mother and fiancee, finished the film and it became a dedication to Brandon's life. The rest of the cast, which includes some stellar character actors like Michael Wincott, Tony Todd and Ernie Hudson, is an assemblage of perfection. Each one of them became their characters.

A film  like this required a soundtrack that was second to none and Graeme Revell delivered in spades. The haunting music captured the essence of Eric's post-industrial, hard scrabble world and included bands who literally defined that period of time: Stone Temple Pilots, The Cure, Rage Against the Machine, Nine Inch Nails, The Jesus and Mary Chain and Pantera to name but a few. I can't imagine another soundtrack other than this one. Who would they get now? Danny Elfman? Black Keys? Not.

To add even more storied history to this film, after Lee's death, Paramount Pictures pulled out, leaving the cast and crew high and dry. Miramax then stepped in and ponied up a further eight million dollars to complete the picture. Indeed, The Crow is more than a film, it is both epic and epitaph, a movie that should never, ever be remade.

Brandon Lee is forever Eric Draven.

How To Survive A Heat Wave

My fat rear end has been roasting of late, so I have collected many a tip for fighting the heat, keeping your cool and some other etiquette tips to keep you and others from going homicidal.

1. Plastic kiddie pools  make great ice baths and beer holders. Fill that ancient kiddie pool in the garage with some bags of ice, put in beer and let chill. When the ice becomes water and the drinks are gone, you have a great cold foot bath.

2. On your walk, hit every sprinkler on the route. I have a six block walk to my bus. There are 23 homes that run their sprinklers in the morning. I hit every one on the way to work. It's so hot, i'm dry by the time I get to the office. There are 18 more that run them on the trip back to my house at night.

3. Ice Cream, popsicles and other frozen treats have no calories or fat at this time. As soon as you eat it, you sweat it off on one walk around the block.

4. Illegal, but fun...Open fire hydrants.

5. Use movie coupons and spend as much time in the theater as possible. In this heat, I'll even pay to watch Nicholas Sparks films and/or Twilight. I'm paying for a nap, but in this heat, who cares?

6. Libraries are free places to cool off and read a few good books in the process.

7. Use deodorant at least twice a day. People, we are in close quarters on the bus, I do not want to smell you from downtown to the South Side. If I do, I will cut you.

8. Yeah, heat means less clothes, but if I have to see your sweaty, sunburned  beer gut, I will cut you. Same goes for those size 700 tube tops.

9. Take that thong bikini off your three year old. It's nasty, not cute.

10. SPF 45 works very well for those of us whom the sun does not like very much. I'm what my dad called fish belly white and only burn and peel. Even my Lakota genes are not enough to overcome the overabundance of Lithuanian, German and Irish in me.

11. Fans...Lots and lots of fans. I'm particularly fond of the little ones that mist water. 

So how do you beat the heat? Any good tips?

I'm Miserable

What better way to start off the week than to rant, I ask you? It is so hot here in Chitown, I start to cook in my own sweat after walking out my front door. WTF Mother Nature? The US Fourth of July holiday is tomorrow and as I live in the hood, it's time for me to once again play my annual game, "Firecracker or Gunfire?"Most times I can tell, but there are times where it's pretty difficult because I'm not listening close enough or the noise is too far away. Judging by some of the booms, I'm pretty convinced that the people down the block own a cannon and that they've been re-enacting Gettysburg. Nice to know I live in a state where fireworks possession is illegal.

I've been having my mom stay with me because, are you ready for this Imaginarians? Her central air unit was stolen. Yep, you read that right. Her central air unit was stolen. Those little thieving rats came and pried the whole damn thing right off of its platform. And her homeowners insurance has been ever so helpful. She's a 66 year old asthmatic with heart problems and we get  "a/c is a privilege, not a medical necessity or a vital part of the home itself, therefore we cannot cover  a replacement central air unit." Really? Since when does homeowners insurance get to decide what is medically necessary for someone?

And I must apologize for not being around. My brain has been absolute mush because of this heat. I want to thank you for all the support you showed to author Deatri King-Bey when she was here. You all are the best.

I'll be back tomorrow with a holiday edition of the Insecure Writers Support Group and in the meantime, I'm going to try and stay cool.

This One's For The Girls: Happy Birthday, Title IX!

This Saturday, June 23rd, marks a special place in Women's history and my own personal one for that matter. It is the 40th anniversary of the passing of Title IX, which states:

No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity

This original statute made no specific mention of high school and collegiate athletics, but its impact in this realm has been incalculable. Without it, hundreds of thousands of young female athletes would have had no chance. Before Title IX, women's sports programs were almost non-existent. Only 1 in 27 girls played any kind of varsity sport. Today that ratio is 1 in 2. As of 2008 there are 9,101 women's collegiate athletic teams and more than a million dollars awarded in athletic scholarship money in Division I schools.

It was authored by Senator Birch Bayh of Indiana as an amendment to the Higher Education Act of 1965. He stated "While the impact of this amendment would be far-reaching, it is not a panacea. It is, however, an important first step in the effort to provide for the women of America something that is rightfully theirs—an equal chance to attend the schools of their choice, to develop the skills they want, and to apply those skills with the knowledge that they will have a fair chance to secure the jobs of their choice with equal pay for equal work."

Though athletics is where it is best known, Title IX has had a far-reaching impact on education as a whole. Prior to 1972, women earned 7% of the law degrees, 9% of medical degrees and around 13% of all doctorates. Today that stands at 47% of all law degrees and 43% of all medical degrees. Not to mention that half of all doctoral degrees at US colleges and universities are now awarded to women.

In forty years, my sisters have made tremendous strides. Here's to us. Pomegrante martinis all around!

Now, about that personal history I mentioned...

When I was born, Title IX did not exist, but thanks to its passage, I was able to join a softball league formed in my neighborhood. It was one of the first of its kind in Chicago, the East Side Girls Athletic Association. Below is a picture of my first team, the Debs. I was a catcher, a pitcher, right fielder and second baseman.We spawned three softball All Americans and four Illinois First Team High School All Stars. I wasn't one of them, but that's okay. Speaking of...There's yours truly down on the far right, second one in, hand over her face. So for my teammates Michelle, Sharon, Karen, Joy Ann, Nicole, Ginger, Tina, Lisa, Peggy, Chris, Darcy, Debbie and the three whose names escape me, Happy Birthday Title IX!

Quick Hits

Yikes! I can't believe its Thursday already. Where has the week gone? I have been up to my eyeballs in work every day so far and I've been going crazy. But, it's far better than no work at all. Anyway, I just wanted make a quick post  and tell you all a few things before I head into the office.

First, my short article on Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is live over at Static Multimedia. You can check it out here. You'll note my name isn't there, but that's because there is a formatting glitch so they have added a page for each contributor, which is awesome. They hope to get it fixed soon.  My page is here with all the rest of my articles for them. Anyway, I loved the ALVH novel and can't wait to see the film.

If you love the movie Black Rain, my good friend Brent over at Criminal Movies as written an excellent essay breaking down the film. You can check it out here. He gets some spectacular discussions going over there.

Did anybody catch the "teaser" trailer for Breaking Dawn, Part Who The Hell Cares? Neither did I. You know, I wonder if Marvel is going for the Twilight crowd since Andrew Garfield, the new Spiderman, looks remarkably like R Patts. Maybe it's the hair...