Twilight: Breaking Dawn, Part Deux
This movie is the cherry on the shit sundae that is the Twilight film series. All I can say is "Thank God, the nightmare is over."
Cosmopolis
Who the hell keeps giving Robert Pattinson work? This was a boring, confusing snorefest about a stupid rich boy.
Anna Karenina
In which fucking Keira Knightley and her sugar daddy, Joe Wright, ruin another great novel.
The Grey
This is one male chest beating cliche after another. "I am Man, grrr... See me fight Wolf" An utter bore with lackluster acting and insipid direction. I was shocked at how bad Liam Neeson is in this film.
The Vow
I'm sorry, but I just cannot stomach sugar coated romantic dreck. They should have saved themselves the budget and gone right to the Hallmark Channel or Lifetime Movie Network. I had to double up on my diabetes meds after this one.
Chronicle
I hate found footage, but couple that with a cliche-ridden story about wastoid teenage boys who get superpowers and you have one of my worst nightmares. There was nothing original or exciting about this film whatsoever. The writing and cast were so awful, I want to bleach the experience from my brain.
What To Expect When You're Expecting
They made a movie based on an ancient self help book for pregnant women. 'Nuff said.
Playing for Keeps
Honestly Gerry, I love you. But you have got to stop doing these half-witted rom coms and get back to doing 300/Coriolanus calibre work. You haven't had chemistry with a leading lady since Lena Heady.
Okay, done ranting. I'm sure I'll be hearing all kinds of "WTF, Mel," but, movies are subjective and one woman's trash is another person's treasure. ;) Stay tuned for my Best of 2012.
Yes, glad the Twilight series is over.
ReplyDeleteChronicle was all right. And I liked The Grey, only because it surprised me by being a drama rather than the action film the commercials touted.
My worst is still Lockout. Guy Pearce, what were you thinking? After The Time Machine, he really should've learned to stay away from science fiction films.
The Grey did not have any drama at all for me because it was six male stereotypes doing that the exact things those stereotypes always do. Lazy storytelling as usual from Carnahan.
DeleteLockout was pretty bad, but I enjoyed it far more than any of the films here. And I LOVED The Time Machine. :)
The fact that you sat through the Twilight movies should earn you a medal of some sort. Great list all around, I enjoyed Chronicle and The Grey a bit more than you did.
ReplyDeleteLOL, I wonder what that medal would be? For valor or for persistence?
DeleteGlad you enjoyed the list. I liked yours as well. We saw some great flicks and some truly heinous ones this year.
I just tried watching Cosmopolis last night! Turned it off after 40 minutes. Contrived drivel. Ugh.
ReplyDeleteHey Hannah! Cosmopolis was truly dreadful. I had a hard time staying awake until the end. I should have turned it off as well. :)
DeleteTHE VOW would've been a real sugar treat for me, the romcom lover, but only if it starred me and Channing, not that wimpy what-her-name-is?
ReplyDeleteAnd any film with RPats, KStew and Knightley is doomed and horrid
You and Channing would make a stunning couple indeed, my sweet. And yes, you two would light up the box office. :)
DeleteWe are definitely of a like mind on those three horrible actors. :)
I think I avoided most really bad movies. Except Prometheus. I HATED that film.
ReplyDeleteDiane, I have not seen Prometheus and have been hemming and hawwing every time I go to the Red Box. :)
DeleteHa! How do you really feel about them? ;)
ReplyDeleteI haven't seen these I'm happy to say!
LOL Glad you got a laugh, Laura. Good on you for having avoided these stinkers. :)
DeleteAs always, you make me laugh. Sorry you had to double-up on your diabetes meds, Melly. Thanks for the warning about a slew of movies I now know not to waste my time or money on.
ReplyDeleteI hope things get better soon, so you'll kicking life's ass.
Hugs to you,
xoRobyn
Thanks, Robyn! I'm happy to warn you about these. It's painful taking a hammer blow to the head for others, but I got your back. ;)
DeleteHugs!
Didn't care for the 1st three Twilight films but enjoyed Breaking Dawn Part 2. Have avoided Playing for Keeps, but I reckon you're right; hottest chemistry may have been with his Queen Gorgo. Ever see his flick, "Dear Frankie?" Grim Scottish tear-jerker, in all the right ways. His role is a small one, but it's perfect. Happy new year!
ReplyDeleteNothing like 300 and Queen Gorgo! I will definitely have to check out Dear Frankie as I have not seen it. Thanks for the heads up. :)
DeleteHappy New Year!
Be sure to have a full box of tissues by your side when you watch it! ;-)
DeleteI haven't seen a one of them! Huzzah for me! (Sorry for you!)
ReplyDeleteYou are lucky, lucky, lucky, my friend! I wish I could say the same, but then if I did, there wouldn't be a list. LOL
Deletesomeone just bash my twilight??? :D hahaha...some things are just not for everyone righ? haha..
ReplyDeleteGreat minds do not always think alike and sometimes we veer off in opposite directions. :)
DeleteI'm glad that I never saw any of these :) Though I was interested in seeing Chronicle ... I guess I'll wait until it hits the bargain bin before I part with my money :)
ReplyDeleteJamie
Chronicle is definitely Bargain Bin fodder. You don't ever want to part with full price for that one. Not even a fiver. ;)
DeleteThankfully, I haven't seen any of them Melissa. I might check out Chronicle though. I'm a sucker for superhero movies.
ReplyDeleteAvoid it Maurice. it's not even a superhero film. It's nothing but self-indulgent teen boys who suddenly find themselves with powers. Nothing original as boys are always the ones with super powers where girls only get to be witches.
DeleteI didn't mind The Grey... but I was in the mood for something painfully slow where nothing actually happens, except for characters getting picked off one at a time, lol.
ReplyDeleteLOL It reminded me of Jaws, but with wolves. Only the characters in the shark film were way better and there was more action.
DeleteThe only movie on your list that I've seen (and I am embarrassed to be saying so) is Twilight: Breaking Dawn, Part Two. In my defense, I did make fun of it an awful lot. Much to the delight of the legitimate fans surrounding me in the theater.
ReplyDeleteYou are one brave woman. I kept my mouth shut and slunk down into the seat for this one. I could feel my brain cells dying off as I watched. LOL
DeleteI wouldn't say The Grey was the worst film I saw last year, but it wasn't good either.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad we saw this in the bargain theater in Indiana. i would ahve killed has I paid full price to see this one. LOL
Delete