Sunday, January 6, 2013
Movies: The Worst of 2012
Twilight: Breaking Dawn, Part Deux
This movie is the cherry on the shit sundae that is the Twilight film series. All I can say is "Thank God, the nightmare is over."
Who the hell keeps giving Robert Pattinson work? This was a boring, confusing snorefest about a stupid rich boy.
In which fucking Keira Knightley and her sugar daddy, Joe Wright, ruin another great novel.
This is one male chest beating cliche after another. "I am Man, grrr... See me fight Wolf" An utter bore with lackluster acting and insipid direction. I was shocked at how bad Liam Neeson is in this film.
I'm sorry, but I just cannot stomach sugar coated romantic dreck. They should have saved themselves the budget and gone right to the Hallmark Channel or Lifetime Movie Network. I had to double up on my diabetes meds after this one.
I hate found footage, but couple that with a cliche-ridden story about wastoid teenage boys who get superpowers and you have one of my worst nightmares. There was nothing original or exciting about this film whatsoever. The writing and cast were so awful, I want to bleach the experience from my brain.
What To Expect When You're Expecting
They made a movie based on an ancient self help book for pregnant women. 'Nuff said.
Playing for Keeps
Honestly Gerry, I love you. But you have got to stop doing these half-witted rom coms and get back to doing 300/Coriolanus calibre work. You haven't had chemistry with a leading lady since Lena Heady.
Okay, done ranting. I'm sure I'll be hearing all kinds of "WTF, Mel," but, movies are subjective and one woman's trash is another person's treasure. ;) Stay tuned for my Best of 2012.